why art school wasn't for me
explaining my personal thoughts about art school, and why it didn't work for me.
When I entered college, I was accepted as a Studio Art major with a concentration in painting and drawing. This path made the most sense to me at the time for several reasons. In first grade, I tested into the Talented Visual Arts program in my school district, and continued receiving advanced art instruction until graduating from high school. In March of 2020, the pandemic effectively shut down my school, and abruptly ended my high school experience. During quarantine, I painted more than ever before, and was convinced that I would do so forever. That August, I started undergrad, and as much as I enjoyed my studio courses that semester, I knew it wasn’t the path for me.
Art and academia have always been linked for me, but as I have gotten older I realized that I do better when the two are separate. I am bad with authority, and I am stubborn, so I’m not a fan of working within guidelines or a rubric. In university entry level, studio courses are very structured. Props and still life scenes set up in the middle of the room, and easels with huge pads of paper surrounding the assortment. For a full semester, students will draw these scenes with the same stick of charcoal, and be graded on them for attention to detail, proper shadows and highlights, and shape accuracy. While I believe in the academy of art, I personally did not benefit from this modality. When I make art, I focus more on style than form. What I mean by that is I want to look at art and recognize it as my own, as unique to me and my brain. When I was in my studio class, I looked around and saw a bunch of versions of the same scene, in the same monochromatic palette, with the same critiques. I felt creatively stifled, and it made me miserable. For the first time in my life, I dreaded going to art class. Art class! The one place that I have always loved, the one place I had gone to repeatedly from first grade on, was now the place that I felt the most limited. I realized that the reason I was able to make so much art during quarantine was because I had the complete freedom to make whatever I wanted. I had no guidelines, just paint and canvases. Art to me is a tangible representation of feeling, of emotion, of knowledge, and I don’t feel like I can channel that in a structured setting.
After my first semester, I decided to change my major from Studio Art to Art History. Changing my course of study may have been the best decision I have made to date. I felt more in tune to my creativity because I was now given the tools to deeply analyze works of art from various time periods, regions, and artists. I could further learn about my own stylistic choices in my art after understanding why other artists made theirs. I also realized that solely painting and drawing was not going to fulfill my creative needs, and a lot of that has now been filled by writing, listening, and discussing concepts with my peers.
In my final semester of undergrad, I wormed my way into an advanced figure painting course with the permission of my college and the instructor, and found myself much more motivated to go to class when I did not have to spend all day, every day in the studio. This was my first time taking a painting course, as my entry level studios were drawing and 3D design, and found it really beneficial to my practice as an artist. While we were all painting the same model, we were given minimal cues as to what needed to be in our paintings. For the final project, we were encouraged to collage a variety of objects, spaces, the only requirement being that our model was somewhere within the composition. I was able to merge my art historical strengths in analysis and developing context for a work, while also fine tuning my craft as a painter. Growth was the goal of the course, not academic painting, which was really beneficial to me.
Being an art history major meant I was still enrolled in the same school as the studio students, so, naturally, a lot of my friends were art majors. I was very observant of their work, and what they were doing at school. Sometimes, I envied them for their ability to make art on a timeline, and how they could take a prompt or assignment and turn it into something unique. I’m not sure if that power is just one I don’t possess, but I was never able to do it quite like the people around me. When it comes to imagery, I think I need to be able to visualize it from start to finish, and that is hard to do when I cannot come up with the context myself. When I was in studio, I treated my pieces as a means to an end; a good grade. As a self-proclaimed nerd, I like to get A’s, so getting lower grades on art I made was a tough blow to my psyche. What do you mean this drawing is worth a B? What am I supposed to change that makes it an A? I have never understood how art projects are graded; how do you tell an artist that their work can be measured on a point scale? I think this bothered my deep into my core. When writing a paper, one may lose points for improper grammar, spelling, or syntax. When doing math, one loses points when they use the incorrect process for an equation and end up with the wrong answer. Science is based on facts, one would lose points on a science exam for not getting their facts right. History is based on true events, people, and dates, so one could lose points on a history exam for misremembering a date. But art is subjective, its nuanced, and its unique to each individual. How does one measure the intrinsic quality of a work of art? Sure, a hyper-realist portrait is seen as a highly academic, complex, and well done piece of art, but can it be graded? I personally do not think so. There is no right or wrong in the art world (in my opinion). Art school and I didn’t jive because I think we have two different ideas about what success looks like for an artist.
To me, linear growth for an artist is impossible. In order to truly explore your capabilities, your style, your mediums, you have to dabble in everything that interests you. Take Pablo Picasso, for example: Picasso is known not for one thing but for many. He went through periods in his art where he focused on certain colors of paint, various styles of cubism, collage works, etc. Had I remained an art major, I would have taken a couple classes from other disciplines, but would have had to focus mainly on painting and drawing to graduate. I also may have driven myself crazy with all of the studio hours.
So, I “left” art school, but I continued to practice art in several forms. I still love to paint, I am a writer, and have been dabbling in digital art and collage. I appreciate being able to create on my own terms, with no deadlines or GPA goals attached. That being said, I have so much respect and awe for my friends (for anyone really) who have gone through art school. It is not easy, or a cop-out like many people believe. It is difficult, and challenging, and requires many hours of dedication. There is no cheating in art school, no Googling answers or sharing test results, it’s just you and your medium. Kudos to all the art schoolers out there, you are braver than me!
*If you didn’t know until now, I am an artist! Check out my work on Instagram @soupcreatesthings, and my online portfolio sophiaperkinsart.com
-soup :)